Lists.

So, I really do think I have seasonal insomnia.  I can stay up for hours on end even when I am completely exhausted.  Then I wake up at 12:30 and get pissed at how much of the day I have lost.  I feel like there are so many things I need to remember right now.  I literally have to make lists of everything. One list for things I need to get done, one list for things I have left to get before college, one list of forms I need to fill out before college, another list of grants and scholarships to apply for, another one for things I need before vacation in two weeks, another list of clothes, toiletries, cleaning supplies and rubbermaids and just an all around inventory of the things I already have done.  

Holy mother.

As much as I feel a taaaddd overwhelmed by it, these things just make me feel more excited, and more independent, and more satisfied with myself when I get some of these things done.  Today I tackled a big one on the list - transferring music onto my macbook from the desk top.  The desktop takes foreverrrrr to burn cds.  its ridiculous.  But I have to get as much music on my ipod and my mac before I leave.  It was kind of a bigger project than I expected, but it was fun to listen to all this old music I hadn't heard in a long time.  

Yesterday I got my official housing letter!!!! So Sam and I are now officially roomies.  We requested each other initially but we didn't know for sure what would happen because nothing was guaranteed.  Everything else has been going fairly smooth with the whole Nazareth transition, I was afraid there would be some catch and Sam and I would get split up, but luckily, it worked out in our favor yet again.  :)  I was relieved and so happy to get the letter in my hands along with my own mailbox number and such.  I feel like such a grown up haha.

I guess its weird that I am surprised that things are going so well with this whole college situation so far.  But then I look back on my high school years and realized that I deserve the good stuff thats coming my way for all the shit I put up with at OHS.  I was talking to my mom the other day and just having a conversation about college versus high school.  I realized that I compromised myself a lot in high school because even though I felt like I was more mature than most of the people around me, I allowed them to take advantage of me and I held back a lot.  I'm excited for college mostly because I am so focused on what I want to do and who I want to be, and because I have learned from high school, I know now that compromising myself is the last thing I want to do.  Its time to be a little selfish and fight for the things I want.  I was way too passive in high school and I probably missed a few really good opportunities because I was busy letting someone else take over.  Good thing I've learned, because these next four years determine the rest of my career.  No room for compromising myself and my abilities.  Oh heyyy!  I DO have a backbone!  :P

Well I'm off to burn more cds and listen to music and tackle more lists.  lists lists lists.  Wish me luck : /