I'm pretty sure that most of you out there in blog land are aware of Post Secret. If you aren't, then get at it. (www.postsecret.com) It's wonderful. Every Sunday I check the new posts and every sunday I am moved, or entertained, and shocked or relieved. Every Sunday, I feel a little less alone knowing that a lot of the secrets we are afraid to let out, we already share in common with a lot of other people in the world. Sometimes the weight of these secrets stays with me through the day and I wonder if whoever they belong to, feel better about sharing it. There is so much we hide from each other. Some secrets are necessary, some are just simply a burden.
Shake it loose. Let it go. You aren't alone.
So I thought maybe if there are people out there who can share secrets, then so can I. It took me a while to really think of things people may or may not know about me, I've never had much to hide. But I'm coming up with a list. (If you haven't noticed by now, I kind of have a thing for lists.)
*I play the guitar and sing by myself in my room when I'm feeling stupid or stressed out. I'd never really play out for anyone. I do it when I have to remind myself I'm good at something even if I want no one to hear or see.
* I stole a shit load of art supplies from my high school art teacher. I figured it was justified. She robbed me of my inspiration, independence and creativity....I robbed her classroom.
*If I meet a guy who is shorter than me, I automatically keep it platonic. I know it sounds shallow and sometimes I hate myself for it, but I've been tall my entire life. I've been the big sore thumb in every group of friends I've ever had. I just want someone to make me feel small, protected, safe.
*Sex scares me. I'm afraid I just won't be what anybody wants.
*When I'm feeling bad about myself, I clean.
*I wait for you to call me or text me still. You don't unless it is once in a while. Even then I still get excited to see your name on my phone. I can't stand that. I resent you. You make me feel stupid, inferior, and vulnerable. But I'd still meet up with you at weird hours in random parking lots to make out if it meant I could keep you as my friend.
*Oh, and you aren't that good of a kisser. In fact I think you got worse since the last time I saw you.
*In fourth grade Mr. Mazzota yelled at me for shooting spitballs at Nick Somethingsomething. I was so embarrassed I cried after school.
*The reason I have so many gay friends is because gay men are the only men I trust.
*I told you I had to work, but really I just didn't want to see you.
*I walked out of a bathroom stall once with my skirt stuck in my panties. It's happened three times in my life thus far. I thought that was only supposed to happen in movies!
What are your secrets? < click it and be inspired.
